Article by Pam Black, owner of Pam Black Weddings. First appeared in Die Beeld/Die Burger newspaper.
Many, many articles, indeed complete books, have been written containing advice for the bride, not only on what to wear but also what is expected of her on her wedding day. Unfortunately, it is sad but true that there is not much advice available for the groom and as one groom remarked ‘We’re the ones that need the advice’. ‘My fiancé has been dreaming about this day since she was born, I’ve only thought of it since we got engaged!’
I love the good advice South African Colin Cowie, celebrity style-maker and now wedding guru to the stars in the USA gives to grooms, namely: ‘Its important to look confident and completely at ease on your wedding day and you can’t do this if you are decked out in some costume that just isn’t you.’
Whilst it is a nice touch to match the colours of the men’s accessories to the wedding colours, Colin advised against being talked into having all the groomsmen wearing matching pink cummerbunds and bowties simply because the bridesmaids are wearing pink. He maintains that dark shades of blue, green or grey look better on men.
Our top tips for grooms
Spend time on your speech. Don’t leave it to the last minute – your speech is important. This is one speech you can’t ad lib. The majority of your speech is going to consist of thanking everyone involved in the wedding, from both sets of parents to Aunt Agatha who baked the cake. By taking plenty of time to prepare it, you won’t run the risk of forgetting to thank someone. And remember that if it is captured on video, your speech is going to be around for a long, long time!
Grooms forget that their hands are going to be on display and zoomed in on by their photographer and videographer – it’s advisable to take time to make sure that yours look the part.
A tip from a videographer – get rid of the chewing gum before the service and make sure all your attendants do as well! While chewing of gum might not be noticeable at the time it is very noticeable on a video.
If you are having a church wedding, in which case you will probably have to kneel, remember to check the soles of your shoes to ensure that there are no forgotten price stickers lurking there or funny sayings written by friends.
A word of caution – if you are hiring an outfit for the wedding make sure you try it on either at the hiring company or at home at least the day before so that if anything needs changing you have time to do so. And, if you are going away on honeymoon, remember to ask someone to return it for you after the wedding.
Surprise your new wife. If you are using the services of a videographer enlist his aid and at the reception find a private spot and record a special message for her – imagine her delight when she watches the video after the wedding!
When booking the accommodation for the wedding night, try and choose somewhere close to the reception venue so that you don’t have to travel far after the event. If possible, book an extra night’s accommodation to allow yourselves time to sleep and not have to check out early. Most couples report that they were so tired after their wedding that all they wanted to do the next day was sleep!